I’ve just read a blog post (http://thoughtcatalog.com/john-smith/2014/06/13-things-a-woman-can-do-to-be-more-attractive-to-men/) and to be frank it has royally pissed me off so I’m going to take it apart, ish. No ‘hate’ intended but a person can write a list telling me how to be attractive, I can write a countering list telling people how I’m in a perfectly happy relationship with a perfectly sane guy and I do barely any of these things.
Note: the original blog was written from a guy to girls so that’s the only reason I’m returning it, girl to guys.
1. Stay in Shape
Fair play on this one. it’s not necessarily a ‘you must be model attractive or i’m off’ but staying healthy is ideal for all involved, particularly yourself. my weight’s fluctuated by about a stone since i began my relationship and no complaints, it’s mainly muscle after all but it’d be an issue if i suddenly piled on 3 stone of fat and it should be.
2. Lay Off the Body Modification
this is the one that annoyed me the most. everyone is entitled to their own tastes of course but ultimately, a person should just be glad that they’re the chosen one that’s allowed anywhere near the other person’s body not so superficial and close-minded that they’re going to moan about pink her or a few tattoos. i have 2 tattoos and i plan on getting more, my hair is usually my natural colour but i like to play about with it, my body my decision. this has caused some disagreements but ultimately we’re grown ups that see past it.
3. Make Your Own Money
within in reason and where possible, yes. Should you be married and one retires early or you decide it’s best for the children that one parent stays home or whatever than maybe not but at least in the beginning, how can you go into a equal relationship if you immediately rely on the other person to support you.
4. Be Feminine
to be honest, people get so annoyed about what is feminine and what is masculine that it’s all descended into nonsense so why don’t we just stop using the terms and let people act however they wish.
5. Be Submissive
nope. unless that’s how you enjoy your ‘alone’ time, there’s no need and I don’t want to know or talk about it. there’s give and take in all relationships, you take it in turns spoiling the other and so on but ‘submissiveness’ does not need to be brought into that. just no.
6. Sex Life
good sex is necessary. and yes, the majority of people wouldn’t want to be the 1000th person their partner had slept with but really, even hookers deserve husbands.
7. Be Intelligent
yes. know how to hold a conversation beyond the mundane or life will get boring.
8. Be Childfree
bollocks. what if someone was married, had a child textbook fairytale style then he died? that woman still deserves a partner and that child deserves a father figure.
9. Be Willing to Cook at Least Three Times a Week
but it’s ok to eat takeout the other 4 nights because nothing is mentioned about the man cooking. just cook as when you can/want/work permits. jeeeezz, fifties clothes are nice but the relationship ideals are way outdated.
10. Put Down the Phone
yeah, it’s far better to have the person you’re with’s undivided attention but if they want to post a few selfies all over the internet of you guys and what you’re up to, take it as a bloody compliment!
11. Ease Up on the Makeup
less is more for sure but never go out feeling uncomfortable. i have acne, i wear make up but i know that being an orange clown is not attractive, to me or anyone else.
12. Stop Cussing
they say that those that swear more are actually more trustworthy. Yes the f word every other sentence isn’t nice but aslong as it isn’t in front of the parents/grandparents, does it really matter? i actually think it is a really honest way of showing passion and feeling in some circumstances and passion’s awesome.
13. Stop Hoarding Guy Friends
I like guys more than girls and it shows in the friends i keep. no one’s changing that. also, for a boyfriend it means that she can fulfil the ‘friend’ part of ‘girlfriend’. yes they may want to sleep with her but take it as a compliment that you have a hot girlfriend and trust that she won’t, if you can’t trust her then why are you with her? and that ‘i trust her but not them’ is absolute nonsense so don’t even try it.
So I agree with 5 of these mostly but the rest are ridiculous. As long as ultimately you’re decent person, there is someone out there who’s going to find you the most beautiful thing on the planet. Every person and every relationship is different so don’t try to fit some kind of mould. You in your human imperfectness, makes you perfect for someone else out there; I promise.
‘I am fearfully and wonderfully made’